I am watching the most incredible sunset of my life on Gili Trawangan, Lombok. I’ve watched the sunset over the ocean consistently for seventeen nights. But this is the sunset I have been waiting for. It’s fiery—full of reds and oranges and seems to get more powerful at every moment.
The sky eventually becomes dark and my heart aches when it’s over. I’m sad that something so beautiful has to end. I get this way when I leave a place I love or when my favorite band plays their last tune. I am especially heartbroken when I have to let go of someone I love. I know life is about change and I still hate letting go!
I don’t want to let go of people and experiences because they seem comfortable and familiar. If I attach, then I can pretend to feel safe. This is my way of avoiding fear, especially my fear of being alone and fear of experiencing loneliness.
To be fully alive, fully human, and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest. To live fully is to be always in no-man’s-land, to experience each moment as completely new and fresh. To live is to be willing to die over and over again. – Pema Chödrön
Watching this magnificent sunset, I completely let go and release my fears into the ocean. Instead, I truly enjoy this moment of bliss and get present to the fluidity and flow of life. The sun will rise and fall again and again and I can enjoy the possibility of life at any moment. When I connect to myself in this way, I become more clear and connected to my brightness, and that ripples out to people around me.
Feeling enlivened, I wander past a bar with live music. There tons of people hanging out but only one local is dancing, so of course I join in! As we dance, more and more people get up to dance too. It only took about 20 minutes to get the whole place going and we dance all night. I am grateful for these moments and still wake up in time for the sunrise that morning!